Just Once

Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived scratched his 32 year old chest. His fingers made small crunching noises as they found brown curls. He smiled and looked down at his bed.

It was a quite ordinary bed. Large and made of mahogany, it sported a heavy white down coverlet. Its four posters rose to the ceiling, light blue curtains swinging lightly in the breeze.

The extraordinary thing was what was in the bed.

Blonde hair spilling out over a crisp white pillowcase glimmered in the morning light. Draco Malfoy slept deeply as Harry smiled wistfully.

They hated each other as children. They grew to despise each other. A single act of what most people would call cowardice changed Draco’s loyalty in the war. If you could call it loyalty. Either way, it worked out favorably for the Order.

They grew up, and then grew together. Harry heard Molly Weasley remarking if either had been born female it was a pureblooded match that would have changed history if it were the 19th Century.

Harry thought that was quite an extraordinary set of circumstances, but Draco had agreed.

‘Our lines are both traceable back to the founding of Hogwarts; they’ve never fallen and had to reestablish themselves. The alliances of houses back when things really mattered would have changed history,” Draco had remarked lightly.

‘Well, then we’d rule the world,’ Harry said.

‘Even I’d be a little frightened,’ Draco chuckled.

Harry took a deep breath and tried not to yawn. Draco snorted in his sleep. Then he farted.

Harry shook his head and stifled a laugh. No, perhaps it hadn’t been all sunshine and happiness, but it was theirs and he was thankful for it.

“What are you staring at?” Draco said stickily. He smacked his lips and made a slurping sound.

“You’re quite lovely in the morning,” Harry said, smiling. “At least until you wake up.”

“Bugger off,” Draco slurred as he burrowed further under the covers. All that hinted of him was a lock of hair poking out of the jumble of coverings.

Harry snorted. He turned and left the bedroom. His bare feet thudded softly on the wooden floor as he went down the hall and went down the stairs.

Harry went through his usual morning motions. Draco had never been tolerable in the morning until after he had some tea. Harry began to brew a pot, and then fixed a tray with some grapes and vanilla wafers.

He watched the Weasley owl flutter through the kitchen window and drop off a letter. He really wished Molly would stop worrying. It’s not like men living without someone to care for them often spontaneously combusted. It was nice when she came over to cook, though.

The Potter house was more suited for entertaining, anyway. With the way the Weasley tendency to exponentially produce, large space was a deciding factor with any gathering.

Draco seemed to welcome the visitors, in his quiet way. He always seemed grateful when a tiny redhead wriggled into his lap with a book or toy. Harry was surprised at Draco’s tenderness with the little ones, although Harry was startled at his sternness.

Charlie’s boys had only done anything dangerous once. A miracle with that many children around. Augustus and Kerry had become annoyed with their 6 year old sisters tagging along after them everywhere and decided to let her have a go at a broomstick. They were both over the age of 14. They knew better.

Apparently they had expected her to fall off as soon as it had moved, but she had the broom clutched in a death grip as it rose quickly in the air. The Weasley adults, Draco, and Harry, heard the screaming from inside the house. Draco had beat Molly out the door.

Charlie remarked they were lucky Draco didn’t get to them first. At least all their grandmother tried to do was remove them from the planet. Draco was threatening to kill them, resurrect them, and kill them again. Harry always thought the image was funny, after Charlie’s daughter was safe on the ground of course.

Harry jumped slightly as the teapot began whistling. He scooped the pot off the burner and slipped a tea cozy over it, then he grabbed the letter from Molly and padded back upstairs, the tray he loaded up floating behind him.

“Good morning, sunshine,” Harry sang out as he returned back to the bedroom. The covers moved with a heavy slithering sound. A groan came from under the covers.

Harry whipped the covers off Draco. Draco lay on his stomach, his knees tucked up under him so his navy blue flannel bum was pointed towards the air. When the sun hit his face he buried it under his pillow. Harry smacked him soundly on the butt.

“Geroff,” Draco mumbled from under his pillow.

“Letter from Molly,” Harry said as he motioned the tray down to a black wooden side table. Draco popped his head out.

“Bringing the kids over Saturday?”

The Weasleys excursions to Harry and Draco’s house were supposedly only going to happen ‘once in awhile.’ It had not slipped Draco’s notice that they had been over every weekend for three months, not that he seemed to mind.

“Haven’t opened it yet,” Harry said, sitting on the edge of the bed holding the heavy brown envelope.

Draco grabbed Harry around the waist and tried to drag him back into bed.

“What are you doing?” Harry laughed.

“I’m cold,” said Draco, pouting. “It’s your fault.”

“The tea will warm you up,” Harry said fighting him off.

“You’ll do a better job,” Draco insisted.

“I’m still sore from last night,” Harry said, slightly annoyed.

“Sorry,” said Draco, grinning.

“You look really sorry,” Harry said, pushing him away and giving him a look.

“Want me to kiss it and make it better?” Draco drawled, waggling his eyebrows.

“I swear, you have multiple personalities in the morning,” Harry said ripping the envelope open. Harry scanned the letter.

“What!” Harry yelled suddenly, startling Draco.

“Everything alright?” Draco said, instantly awake and serious. Harry noticed Draco starting to reach for his wand.

“There’s no threat,” Harry waved at him. “At least not yet.”

Draco struggled to look over Harry’s shoulder. “Then what’s going on?”

“Look at this,” Harry said shoving the letter at Draco. Draco’s face paled as he read it.

“This isn’t true,” Draco said. “I heard it as a child from my nanny. A fairy story.”

“Do you really think Molly would send us a fairy story?”

“She is getting up a bit in age-”

Harry hit him on the shoulder. “Don’t be stupid.”

“Well, it’s not going to be me!” Draco laughed, waving his wand at the teapot. It served the tea and two perfect cups floated on saucers toward them. “You can get yourself knocked up if you want to.”

Harry read the contents of the letter from top to bottom. “It says here in only happens once a millennia.”

“Thank heaven for that,” Draco said, sipping his tea. He sighed happily.

“I think I’ll go see Molly after breakfast,” Harry said.

“I’ll go with you,” Draco said. Harry looked startled. “Well it’s not like a child wouldn’t change my life at all.”

Draco couldn’t quite make out the feelings behind the look Harry was giving him. “Well if she is right, we need to know either way. It’s not like we’ve ever had a need for birth control before.”

Harry looked slightly horrified.

“Honestly, I’d owl Granger,” Draco said. Harry looked surprised.

Surprising no one, Hermione and Draco had never gotten over their dislike for each other. Ron had always backed up Hermione, so when they got married the invitation was addressed to Harry only, even though Draco had moved in three years before. After a curt letter Draco had been reluctantly invited and was treated politely, but he still got sideways glances and there was whispering behind his back.

After the wedding, Ron and Hermione had moved to Spain, following one of her research projects and had never gotten the chance to really get over her dislike of Draco. That was seven years ago.

They always sent Christmas cards, of course, and Hermione’s always contained several pages of updates in their life. She had lost one baby, a girl, something that had nearly reduced Molly to hysteria six years ago. After that Hermione had birthed twin boys and another two sons. She had adjusted her research to Magical Development in Children and had gotten a grant from the Spanish Ministry of Magic. They were happy, if not warmer than Hermione liked.

“That’s not a bad idea,” Harry said. “I’ll do that after we talk to Molly.”

Draco shrugged. “Just a thought.”

“I could write to Dumbledore,” Harry hesitated.

“That barmy old fool,” Draco started, but didn’t contradict Harry. He reburied his head under the pillow after he had emptied his cup. The cup floated back to the tray and the pot began pouring another serving. “Send a warning to Molly. We don’t want to pop in on her and Arthur again.”

Harry laughed at the memory of walking in on the Weasleys. Apparently Arthur had remarked it had been some time since they had tested the stability of their kitchen table. With an empty house they didn’t have as many distractions to stop them. Except for a practically-foster-son and his partner stopping by to say hello.

“Good idea,” Harry said, still snickering. “You’ll have to get dressed eventually, you know.”

“Molly thinks my pajamas are cute,” Draco said, still muffled under the pillow.

“Nice try,” Harry said, intercepting the tea before it got to Draco.

“Hey!” Draco protested, popping his head up.

“It’s what you get for being so lazy,” Harry said, downing the cup. “Now, help me with last night’s dishes.”

“Fine,” Draco said, rolling his eyes. “I’ll do it with magic. You start on the letters.”

“Deal.”

“The boys are coming for tea,” Molly Weasley sang out to her husband as he passed through the kitchen on his way out to the shed.

“Which boys?” Arthur asked, peering over the top of his glasses. He was carrying a large jar full of different size screws.

“Harry and Draco, dear,” Molly said. “They got my owl and are coming right over.”

“Well, that’s nice,” Arthur said, smiling. “Would have been a bit of a nasty shock if they didn’t know.”

“I know,” Molly said clapping her hands together. She went to her husband and clasped his hands in hers. His hair had kept receding and now a reddish ring went in a half-circle around his head. She still thought he looked handsome.

“Just think of it,” she gushed. “And we all thought the lines had ended.”

“Just a moment,” Arthur said, frowning. “Don’t tell me you’re suggesting-

“It may be their only chance,” Molly said, searching her husbands face and frowning slightly.

“They may be happy as they are,” Arthur said.

“When you were their age we already had Bill, Charlie and Percy,” Molly insisted. “Would you redo it?”

“Of course not,” Arthur said. “I’m just saying-

“What are you saying?” Molly had that look: no matter what Arthur said, he was wrong.

“One of the boys may not want to have a baby,” Arthur said. “It’s not like men have the urge to procreate.”

“That’s not how I remember it,” Molly said, crossing her arms at him.

“You know what I mean,” Arthur said, annoyed.

“Well, they still need the information,” Molly said stubbornly. “It’s dangerous for them without it.”

“Fine, fine,” said Arthur rolling his eyes. “Just don’t be disappointed if things turn out different that you expect.”

Molly waved him out the door and he left, shaking his head and looking at his jar of screws.

She went back to preparing for her visitors. Those boys always seemed to be hungry. Corned beef would be filling. They probably would skip lunch altogether. She shook her head.

The plate of sandwiches was set in the middle of the table, a tin of cookies was out and the pot had just begun to whistle when the fireplace roared with green flames and Harry and Draco walked into the kitchen.

“It’ll be just a moment, dears,” Molly said as she bustled about. She waved her wand at a cabinet and cups and saucers soared to the table.

“No rush, Molly,” Draco said as he sat at the table. Molly smiled at both him and Harry. She was positively beaming. It made Draco very nervous.

Harry squeezed Draco’s knee under the table and Draco looked at him. He was smiling nervously.

What was everyone looking at him for?

Absolutely not. Not him. He didn’t care if he was prettier.

“Hell no,” Draco said flatly.

Harry jumped a little. “Beg your pardon?”

Molly turned around with the teapot in her hands. She peered at him.

“What’s that, dear?”

“I’m not getting knocked up,” Draco said flatly. “You can do it if you want, Potter, but I’m not dealing with the bloating and the cramps and the,” he lowered his voice a little, “hemorrhoids.”

Harry’s jaw dropped. Molly exploded laughing.

“I’m serious,” said Draco, a little hysterically.

Molly kept on laughing as Draco scowled. Harry began to snicker a bit, in spite of himself.

“What’s so funny?” Draco demanded.

“You sound like my cousin Abigail when we were 10,” Molly said, wiping a tear from her eye. She waved a hand at him and began serving the tea.

Draco scowled at Harry.

“Hemorrhoids?” Harry said, confused.

“I heard all about it from Pansy,” Draco said, looking at Molly for confirmation. His eyes were wide and his head was bobbing. “She said it was horrible.”

“She gave birth in a muggle hospital,” Molly said, patting Draco on the arm. “There are spells and potions, you know.”

“I don’t care,” said Draco testily, crossing his arms.

“Shame they were visiting Dean’s family at the time,” Harry said. “They could have gotten to St. Mungo’s if they were still in London.”

“It’s still not going to be me,” Draco grumbled. Harry snickered.

“Well,” Molly said, sitting across from them. “I’m sure you will discuss the details later.”

“I’m not sure I’d be opposed,” Harry said, raising an eyebrow at Draco.

“You’d have to stay off that bloody broomstick, then,” Draco said stiffly.

“Who says?” Harry said hotly.

“I’m sure you boys can work out all the details later,” Molly said a bit louder.

Harry and Draco stared at each other for a moment.

Molly inwardly beamed. So they wanted a baby. Now all that was left was to sort out the parts. Wonderful.

“So how is this possible?” Harry asked, turning back to Molly.

“Yea, Concubinus Beran is just a fable,” Draco looked uneasy.

“It’s not a fable,” Molly said. She handed Harry and Draco a very old, leather bound book. Draco looked at it while Harry held it and ran his hand over the cover.

“Where did you get that?” Draco said flatly.

Molly looked embarrassed for a moment.

“Well,” she said, looking around before settling on the tin and reached for it. “It’s yours, dear. It was found in the wreckage.”

Lucius and Narcissa, Draco’s dear parents, had committed double suicide rather than face Azkaban again.

More than a dozen aurors had given chase. To everyone’s surprise, they had gone back to their manor.

Their cloaks were flapping behind them as their broomsticks zipped through the open skylight. It had magically sealed behind them.

The aurors grouped in the yard, communicating with the Ministry for backup and deciding what to do about what they knew was a completely sealed home. Then the vibration started.

The aurors realized what was going to happen barely in time. They had hopped back on their broomsticks and flew as quickly as they could, anywhere but the direction of the house.

The noise was deafening. People as far as 10 kilometers away claimed to have heard the blast.

The Malfoys had destroyed any evidence they might have possessed, including themselves.

The crater from the explosion was blamed on a gas line igniting. Debris was scattered for kilometers.

Harry out a hand on Draco’s back and rubbed it roughly.

“At least your dad was good for something,” Harry smiled slightly.

“I suppose so,” Draco said raising his eyebrows. “Whoever would have thought he’d be useful for something?”

Molly looked slightly startled. Draco almost never remarked on his family.

“What else do you have?” Draco asked, piercing Molly with his clear blue eyes.

“I know you said you didn’t want anything,” Molly squirmed uncomfortably. “But I though maybe one day you would change your mind.”

Draco took a deep breath. Harry didn’t know what to say.

“I know you went through a lot, but if your line ever went on, it’s your history,” Molly insisted.

“It’s not a pleasant one,” Draco said.

“Exactly,” Molly said. Harry nodded.

“It’s better to hear the truth from someone instead of reading about it in a book,” Harry said. “Trust me.”

“The page is marked,” Molly said, gesturing at the book.

Harry opened it and began reading. Draco rested his chin on Harry’s shoulder. Molly sipped her tea and watched them.

“I still think we should write Granger,” Draco said.

“I already did, dear,” Molly said nervously.

Harry and Draco looked up sharply.

“What did she say?” Harry and Draco said in unison.

Molly bit her lip to keep from giggling. She was unexpectedly reminded of the twins. She suspected they would make excellent parents.

“She wants to come out and observe if you decide to conceive,” Molly said slowly. “Including before you conceive.”

“Sure,” Harry said, without thinking of Draco.

Molly looked at Draco nervously.

“Will she be bringing all the babies?” Draco asked. Molly’s look softened.

“I suppose she will,” Molly said. “As well as Ron.”

“Well,” Draco said slowly, looking at Harry. “I think we’re going to have to clear out some of the rooms.”

“Good Lord,” Harry said, looking horrified.

“I’ve been telling you your study’s needed work for ages,” Draco nagged. “Things move in there! It’s unnatural.”

“Fine,” said Harry through clenched teeth. He opened the book to the page Molly had marked with a bit of blue ribbon. “Molly, this just gives astrological positions, how do you know it’s going to happen?”

“I was trying to figure out the best time to plant my new bulbs,” Molly said. “When I started doing the charts I realized there was some unusual activity going on and went from there.”

Draco shook his head. “Well, I know the legend. What else is there?”

“Moreover,” Harry said, clearing his throat. “What are the details and when does this ‘cycle’ start?”

“You’ll be susceptible to pregnancy two Tuesdays from now,” Molly said folding her hands. Harry reached for a sandwich.

“How does this even work?” Draco asked.

“Magically,” Molly said.

“Very funny,” Arthur said as he walked into the kitchen.

“Hello Arthur,” Harry smiled.

“Hello boys,” Arthur said grabbing a sandwich for himself and plunking himself down next to Molly. He pecked her on the cheek.

“What do you think of this ‘baby’ nonsense?” Draco asked.

Arthur looked at Molly quickly.

“Never mind,” Draco said. “That said everything.”

“Oh,” Arthur said worriedly. He pointedly didn’t look at Molly again. “Parenthood isn’t for everyone boys.”

Molly smacked him on the shoulder.

“Now, if you’re going to be like that I’ll ask you to leave the room,” Arthur said hotly. “My opinion was asked for.”

Molly stuck her chin out but remained silent.

“I don’t want you boys to rush into something just because you suddenly have the ability to procreate,” Arthur said seriously. He poured himself a cup of tea. “There will be plenty of unwanted children after this cycle, I’ll tell you.”

Draco and Harry looked suddenly sobered.

“That’s horrible,” said Draco, surprising everyone. “That’s fucking horrible.”

Molly looked shocked, but Draco’s face screwed up.

“Harry, we could wait and just adopt after the orphanages start filling up,” Draco said.

“We can adopt now,” Harry said softly. “We could adopt a few years from now. We could have already tried to adopt. We aren’t talking about adopting. We’re talking about joining our DNA and creating another person.”

Draco looked at Harry for a moment. Light blue eyes gazing into emerald green. Molly fidgeted nervously.

“Sirius James Malfoy,” Draco said softly.

“What?” Harry asked, confused.

“Well, James, for your father,” Draco said. “That would be traditional and suitable for our family’s social standing. Harry’s eyebrow’s raised. “Sirius for your godfather and for representation of my family.”

“I noticed it was first,” Harry said grinning.

“Because you’d let me get away with it,” Draco smiled.

“Hello,” Arthur said, reminding them they were not alone.

“You need one before you name it,” Molly said, looking amused.

“And Malfoy,” Harry went on. “What’s all that about?”

“You’ll iron the details out later,” Arthur said finishing his sandwich and rolling his eyes. Harry was strongly reminded of Ron, except the sandwiches were corned beef.

“Malfoy-Potter then,” Draco said.

“Better,” Harry said, relaxing somewhat.

“So, Molly didn’t get very far explaining things to you,” Arthur said.

“Not really,” Harry said. “But we didn’t really give her a chance.”

“Well,” Molly looked uncomfortable. “Once the sperm enters the body a change begins to take place.”

“Enters the body,” Harry repeated.

“Does this mean: ‘enters anywhere?'” Draco asked eyes wide.

“Well,” Molly faltered. “You have to realize boys, this doesn’t happen very often. We don’t know a lot.”

“You can get preggers from a bit of oral?” Harry thundered before he remembered who he was talking to. Molly blushed a brilliant shade of scarlet.

“Maybe,” Molly said. “We don’t know.”

“Hermione might know,” Harry looked at Draco.

“If anyone does, she will,” Draco agreed.

“We have a couple weeks to talk about this, anyway,” Harry said.

“Yes,” Arthur agreed. “Take the book. Think about it. Let the novelty wear off.”

“You act like you disapprove,” Draco said, looking at Arthur with those piercing blue eyes. His father’s eyes. Arthur shivered a bit.

“I know I wouldn’t want to find myself in that situation,” Arthur said squirming. “Women are odd enough, what will happen when wizarding males start cropping up pregnant?”

“What do you mean by that?” Molly asked accusatorily.

“Mood swings and testosterone don’t go together,” Arthur said sternly. “Once Dumbledore explains the situation to the Ministry emergency birth control might be issued.”

“For pity’s sake,” Molly said dismissively. “It’s not the plague.”

“It may act like one,” Harry started giggling. “We’ll be able to watch it spread through the community through disbelievers.”

Draco chuckled.

“This is serious boys,” Arthur said loudly. The boys stopped. “Haven’t you a thought as to how the child gets out?”

Harry and Draco looked at each other and winced.

“No one knows, actually,” Molly said quietly.

“Excuse me?” Draco said.

“You see, people didn’t used to keep track of things like they do now,” Arthur said, taking his glassed off and polishing them. “We do know male survival in childbirth was a much higher percentage than female for the time.”

“Well, that’s encouraging,” Harry said sarcastically.

“The Ministry should be able to scrounge up more information by next week,” Arthur said.

“So we’ll think about it until then,” Draco said with an air of finality about his voice.

Molly smiled weakly. It hadn’t gone as planned, but it could have gone much worse.

Harry paced back and forth in his study. He looked out the window and sighed.

Draco was sitting in a large overstuffed chair, reading a book. He looked over the top of it at Harry.

“You know, staring out the window isn’t going to make them get here faster,” Draco said.

“I know,” said Harry. “I’m just…I don’t know.” Harry stared out the window and put his arms on the window frame.

“Really nervous,” Draco said, putting his book down. Draco crossed the room and put his arms around Harry’s waist.

“That might be it,” Harry said, giving Draco a wry smile. Draco kissed the back of Harry’s shoulder.

“Hey, look there,” Harry said and pointed to a small black dot in the sky.

“Could be a bird,” Draco said, squinting over Harry’s shoulder.

“Could be a flying carpet,” Harry said, reaching for a pair of omnioculars.

“Flying carpet?” Draco frowned. “Certainly not in Britain.

“She’s here with ambassadorial status,” Harry said, focusing his omnioculars. “It’s registered with the Spanish Ministry.”

“You’ve got to be kidding,” Draco said, snatching the omnioculars.

Harry waited a few moments so Draco could see the flying carpet. Then he snatched the omnioculars back.

“Bugger off and get your own,” Harry laughed. “Or lose the carpet fetish.”

“It looked like an Allegro 2004!” Draco said, lunging for the omnioculars.

Harry sighed and handed Draco the omnioculars. Draco started rattling off statistics as he stared at the sky. Harry crossed the room to get Draco’s omnioculars. They were a better model, anyway. Lazy git.

When Harry got back to the window he smiled at the sight upon the carpet.

Ron sat in an easy chair, reading a newspaper. His hair was beginning to thin, like his fathers. Hermione was next to him in a comfortable chair. A portable desk sat in her lap and she scribbled furiously upon a parchment. Small twin redheads lay on the carpet nearby, their heads in a large book. Harry grinned furiously.

Near to the twins, a smaller dark haired boy played with a few stuffed toys. A basket lay near Ron’s feet. Harry suspected it contained the youngest.

“Gods, they’re sweet,” Draco said, surprising Harry. Harry couldn’t believe Draco stopped prattling about the flying carpet.

“Quite,” Harry said.

There was a loud pop behind them and Harry and Draco turned to see Arthur and Molly apperate.

“I couldn’t stop her,” Arthur said, looking pained. He unwrapped a scarf from around his neck and took his cloak off.

“Hello, Molly,” Harry went to her and kissed her on the cheek. “We’ve just spotted them.”

“And they’ve got an Allegro 2004!” Draco crowed.

“Do they really?” Arthur said, snatching Draco’s omnioculars from Harry and going to the window. Harry sighed.

“Couldn’t imagine keeping you away,” Harry said as he and Molly made their way to the kitchen. “Put the kettle on and I’ll rustle about in the pantry.”

Molly smiled and took her cloak off. “You do that.”

Harry and Molly had just finished laying out the kitchen table when they heard a clatter from the stairs leading from the study.

“They’re landing in the yard,” Arthur said as he scuttled everyone out.

By the time they were out in the yard, the twins and the dark haired boy had left the carpet and were chasing each other around.

Molly flung her arms around Ron, practically knocking him off his feet.

Hermione ran to Harry and did the same thing.

“Save me from my children,” Hermione murmured near his ear.

“10 hours on a carpet enough for you?” Harry chuckled.

“AUGH!” A small voice screamed near their knees.

Harry and Hermione looked down to see her three small walkers pointing sticks at Draco. Hermione looked startled.

“We three,” one of the twins proclaimed. “Arrest you in the name of truth, justice, and jammy tarts for all.”

“Goodness me,” Draco said, laying the back of his hand across his forehead. “Whatever shall I do?”

“Surrender!” the smallest squeaked out.

“You’ll never take me alive!” Draco screamed and reached for his wand. He felt Hermione stiffen and Harry tightened his grip on her.

Draco puffed out a sweet smelling cloud of smoke and dashed across the yard as the children screamed delightedly and ran after him.

“Dear lord,” Hermione said weakly.

“No one was more surprised than me,” Harry said as Draco climbed a tree, shooting bubbles out of the end of his wand.

“Incendio!” a small voice squeaked out and the tree erupted into flames.

Draco jumped quickly out of the tree and rolled around on the ground, the back of one of his shoulders aflame.

Hermione and Ron ran to the children immediately. Ron quickly put the flames out on the tree. Draco picked himself up.

“Leo!” Hermione shrieked, mostly out of fear. The littlest boy burst into tears. The end of his stick was charred. Molly rushed to him.

“Wow,” Draco breathed. Arthur patted Draco down, trying to assess damage.

“Are you alright?” Ron asked quickly, turning Draco around to look at his shoulder.

“I think he just got the robes,” Draco said, trying unsuccessfully to look at his back. “Damn Weasley, I never thought you’d use a sneak attack like that.”

Ron stared at Draco for a moment. Harry was strongly reminded of a confrontation years before in a bookstore. Then Ron started snickering.

“Sure you’re ready for this mayhem?” Ron asked.

“Well, obviously this child is special,” Draco said, gesturing to Leo, who had stopped crying and had let go of his stick.

“You’re funny,” Arthur said. “All wizarding children have little bursts of magic like this.”

“Where did you learn that incantation?” Hermione was demanding of the little boy. The twins were staring at him in awe.

“Daddy,” Leo sniffled. “When he-,” sniffle, sniffle, “dinner-” then he began crying again.

“Oh,” Hermione said, pulling the snotty bundle to her. “Last night?” Leo nodded.

“We’ve never been camping before,” Hermione said to Molly. Molly patted Leo on the head.

“Well, he’s a bloody fast learner if he could pull that off,” Ron said, slightly annoyed at his son. Leo looked up at him. “We do not incinerate people!”

Leo buried his head in his mother’s robes and sobbed.

Hermione pulled him out. “But we’re not going to do it again, right?” Leo shook his head furiously. Molly waved her wand and tidied him up. “So go tell Draco you’re sorry.”

“I’m sorry!” Leo wailed and flung himself at Draco.

“Goodness me, it’s OK,” Draco said, taken aback. “You’ll learn when you get bigger.”

Leo looked up. “Really?”

“Really.” Draco insisted. “Now, you and your brothers should go up into the kitchen and get some lunch.”

The little ones needed no more instruction than that and barreled up the back steps to the kitchen.

“At least you’ll only have one,” Hermione shook her head. “I swear Adam and Will run interference for him.” Harry assumed she meant the twins.

“And who is this little guy?” Harry asked as the bundle in the basket began to wail.

“Kelly,” Hermione said as she reached for him. “And he’s hungry.”

“Well, I have a nice stone bench over here,” Harry pointed.

“Or we have a nice cozy house,” said Draco, visibly annoyed. Ron raised his eyebrows in approval. Behind Draco’s back, of course.

“I think we’d better check up on the kids,” Hermione said. She winced as they heard the sound of breaking glass in the kitchen. Arthur hurried up the stairs as everyone else gathered the Weasley’s things and brought them in the house.

“It was just a glass,” Arthur said as everyone piled into the kitchen. Will, Adam, and Leo sat in a row with napkins tucked in their shirts and fruit and sandwiches in front of them. “We got it all sorted out.”

“Thank god,” Ron said under his breath.

Harry showed Hermione and Kelly to his study.

“You don’t have to go,” Hermione said as Harry turned. He turned back, a bit uncomfortably. “You’re going to need to get used to the idea.”

“What?” Harry asked, startled.

“Well, the pregnancy process is complete, from what we know,” Hermione said. “Either you or Draco will be nursing.”

Harry’s jaw dropped. He barely registered when Hermione slipped a breast out of her robes and into Kelly’s mouth.

“There,” Hermione said, wincing a bit.

“Does it hurt?” Harry said, squirming.

“Since his teeth started coming in, yes.”

Harry looked horrified.

“Oh it’s not all that bad,” Hermione said and she and the baby began visibly relaxing. “He’ll get a rhythm and be fine.”

Harry looked at mother and son and grinned.

“What?”

“I can’t imagine me or Draco doing that,” Harry said, reaching up and rubbing the back of his head.

“I can’t imagine you would,” Hermione said, smiling. Harry went and sat near her on the couch. “Have you decided who’s going to carry?”

“No,” Harry said. “I don’t even know if what we’re doing is right.”

“What do you mean?” Hermione asked, shifting Kelly slightly.

“I mean, we never talked about kids before,” Harry said, fidgeting. “The whole thing makes me nervous.”

“Want in on a secret?” Hermione asked.

“Sure,” Harry said.

“You’re never sure,” Hermione said. Harry looked at her. “Well with the twins it just wasn’t a good time. We were still getting over the loss of the one we lost and I had flung myself into all these projects to help distract me. I had to go through my pregnancy trying to construct a series of import laws to prevent the movement of Dark Artifacts through Spain. When Leo decided to make his presence known the twins were just out of diapers. I thought I’d kill myself if I had to start up again.”

Harry started laughing.

“Oh yea,” she said, testily. “You think it’s funny now, just you wait.”

Harry slightly composed himself.

“Then when this little fella was created I had just picked up my research on Advanced Potions again,” Hermione sounded a little annoyed. “Can’t very well be around all those fumes when you’re expecting, can you?”

“Yea, but it was worth it, wasn’t it?” Harry was feeling nervous.

“Better be,” Hermione said, looking a bit amused. “Might be another on the way.”

“When do you find the time?” Harry demanded as Hermione handed him Leo. She did herself up as Harry burped Kelly.

“I really don’t know,” Hermione said, sighing.

“Ever regret it?” Harry asked, making a funny face at Kerry, who seemed very interested in Harry’s glasses.

“Only on days where I have to travel with them,” Hermione sighed. “Or when they set things on fire.”

Harry laughed and handed Kerry back to his mother.

“Do you really love him?” Hermione asked Harry.

“Yes, I do,” Harry said. Hermione shook her head.

“Amazing,” Hermione said.

“No one was more surprised than us,” said Harry awkwardly. “Believe me.”

“That, I can believe,” Hermione said, grinning. “So tell me what you know already.”

“That I want to spend the rest of my days with him,” Harry said, blushing.

“I know that, silly. I do talk to Molly. I meant about the Concubinus Beran cycle.”

“It happens every thousand years or so and enables wizarding males to get pregnant,” Harry recited. “The birth itself is a mystery, but the birth rate was higher than for contemporary pregnancies in the dark ages.

“Very good,” Hermione said, looking impressed. “But we think we know how the babies are born.”

“Really?” Harry asked. “Is it terribly unpleasant?”

“Not really,” Hermione said, reassuring Harry. “It looks as if a magical c-section takes place.”

“Are you saying the child erupts from the midsection?” Harry asked, paling slightly.

“Something like that,” Hermione said. “Although not nearly as messy as you would imagine.”

“Well, that’s some relief,” Harry said. “Are you hungry, we’ve plenty of food?”

“Famished, actually,” Hermione admitted.

“Well then,” Harry said smiling. “We should get you fed and settled in. Three of the bookshelves pull down here to make beds for the boys.”

“Very clever,” Hermione remarked. “We brought a collapsible crib for Kelly.”

“I’m glad you came, ‘Mione,” Harry said suddenly.

“It’s been too long, Harry,” Hermione said, her eyes pooling with tears.

“Now there,” he said, reaching into his pocket and retrieving a handkerchief. “Don’t be like that. We’re all together now and only one person has been set on fire.”

Hermione hiccupped out a giggle. “Whoever would have thought?”

“Indeed,” said Harry, giving her a hand. “Let’s get some lunch.”

AN: Some people will think Draco’s speech when dealing with any kids is strange, but I have applied some real life experiences to my fic. I hang out with a pretty diverse group of people. Over the years, many of them have had children.

You have not seen anything until you see a bunch of former crusty and gutter punks knitting and singing ‘10 Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed.’ (Piercings, tattoos, leather, spikes, and all…) Not to mention more than one of these children was named after the liquor their mother missed the most while they were incubating. (I wish I was kidding.)

‘Goodness me’ was a necessary integration before any (far more) interesting words were picked up. (In the 7th grade my best friend told me her little brother’s first word was the ‘B’ word. Made us all a bit careful around the babies.)

Harry and Draco lay in their bed peacefully. The morning sun was filtering through the transparent window coverings, giving the room a grayish tinge. Harry cuddled closer to Draco. Infuriating, the way he always took the covers.

Draco pushed back at Harry in a way Harry wasn’t expecting at all. With a lazy sigh, Harry snuggled his head in at the nape of Draco’s neck and reached a hand up to Draco’s chest. Draco brought a hand up to meet Harry’s. Their fingers intertwined and Harry felt his fingertips brush the dusting of blonde hair on Draco’s chest.

Harry began waking up. He pushed forward, his usual morning state proving itself useful. Draco moaned slightly and arched his back.

“Morning,” Harry whispered.

“Good morning,” Draco said, reaching back to adjust his partner’s erection through his pajama pants.

“You know we only have another week of this without repercussions,” Harry said, his breathing getting heavy.

Their bedroom door was flung open with a bang. Three small boys tore into the room.

“Good morning!” the twins sang.

“Or not,” Draco muttered.

“Boys!” Hermione’s voice rang out. “I told you to knock!”

“They were awake!” Leo yelled. Harry groaned.

“Boys!” Hermione said, drawing a pink dressing gown around her middle tightly. “I told you they might be having Private Time!”

“They can’t have Private Time!” Will or Adam proclaimed. After three days Draco and Harry still couldn’t tell the difference.

“And why not?” Draco asked haughtily.

“You’re not parents,” Adam or Will said and made a face.

“Well, they might want to be and you need Private Time for that,” Hermione said with a frown. “Knock next time. Or get an eyeful of what you deserve.”

“Gee, thanks,” Harry said weakly.

“Harry said we could have broom rides today,” one of the twins protested.

“After breakfast,” Hermione said. “Now, down to the kitchen.”

Small voices protested, but went back into the hall.

“Gods,” Hermione said, shaking her head. “I’m sorry.”

“We should have locked it,” Draco said, yawning.

“No you shouldn’t,” Hermione said, annoyed. “It’s basic manners to knock.”

Ron yawned as he walked in the door. He spotted Harry and Draco. He visibly jumped.

“Oh dear,” he blurted out. “I mean - I don’t - the boys – they need to learn to knock!”

“They didn’t see anything funny,” Harry said, sighing. He knew Ron a bit too well.

“I didn’t mean,” Ron started, red creeping up his face.

“Well, I certainly don’t want them pointing and laughing at me,” Draco said, pulling the covers up. “Small children have a peculiar sense of humor and my bum is particularly pale.”

Hermione began to laugh.

“What? You’re surprised?”

“Luminescent, more like,” Harry said tossing the covers off, his ardor cooled.

“Yea?” Draco said sarcastically. “Well, you’ve got a crooked winky.”

“Too much!” Ron said covering his ears and running from the room.

Hermione roared.

“Gods, neither of you have changed,” she managed to choke out. “Well, except for the matching pajamas.”

“They were on sale and they only had one color left,” Harry said, annoyed.

Draco yawned widely. “Molly thinks they’re cute.”

“I’d like to take some samples later this afternoon,” Hermione said. “So don’t get romantic if you get the inclination.”

Draco shrugged. It seemed as if he expected as much. He got out of bed and stretched. Hermione found herself admiring the view for a moment. She shook her head to clear it.

“Tea!” Leo sang out as he followed 3 floating cups of tea into the bedroom. Harry, Hermione, and Draco each took one when they stopped.

“Why, thank you,” Harry said, smiling.

“Breakfast in twenty minutes,” Leo said proudly before turning and pounding his little feet back down the hall.

Draco sipped at his tea, but quickly sputtered it out.

“What’s wrong?"” Hermione asked as Harry pounded him on the back.

“They’ve used salt instead of sugar!” Draco exclaimed.

“He’s letting the twins help,” Hermione said in horror.

The three of them pounded towards the kitchen.

“Well,” said Ron, taking a bit of his omelet. “This is quite nice.”

The twins, who were still covered in flour, nodded in agreement. Leo, one side of his hair plastered down with a bit of dried egg, gurgled.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full, dear,” Hermione said.

“They were only in here for 10 minutes,” Draco said, his voice faint.

The twins had been fighting over who got to help their father measure flour when the bag in question exploded with a burst of uncontrolled magic. The kitchen was coated with white powder. Leo had been holding an egg, which he threw in fear. Unfortunately for him, he threw towards the ceiling.

“You have no idea,” Ron said, beginning to laugh. “They got into my shed one day. Burned outlines of themselves through the wall with a Magical Cutter. Could have severed an ear.”

“Then we had to patch the child-sized holes,” Hermione said. “And it’s all this one.” She gestured at Leo. “Never had problems with the twins until this one. Clever boys.”

The children beamed. Apparently they were used to being teased in this way.

“We were measuring our bodies,” said Will or Adam.

“So if we were kidnapped by pirates they could identify us by the holes in the wall,” Adam or Will said.

Draco nodded as if this made sense.

“We were at my parents and they saw a bit of some crime show on the telly,” Hermione rolled her eyes.

“You were doing body outlines?” Harry asked them.

The boys mimed grotesque poses, their tongues lolling out and syrup dripping from their forks.

“Oh, I say!” Draco said, laughing.

“You’ll think it’s funny until one of yours puts a hole in the wall,” Hermione said shaking her head.

A cry sounded from the next room and Ron rolled his eyes.

“I’ll get him,” Hermione said. “He’ll enjoy a bit of egg.”

“I don’t know how you manage,” Harry said, shaking his head.

“Well, they’re great kids,” Ron said. The little ones beamed. “They’re rambunctious, but they’re usually polite and well behaved.”

“We’re nice!” Will and Adam said in unison.

“Of course you are,” Harry said assuredly.

“Are you done eating yet?” Leo asked, his plate clean.

“One more bit of sausage,” said Harry, chewing fast. “Done!”

The children cheered and Harry led a small parade up the stairs.

“We do have to get our clothes on first,” Harry said, his voice fading. “And don’t forget your cloaks.”

Hermione walked back into the kitchen, Kelly smiling happily in her arms.

“Wave hello to Uncle Draco,” Hermione said absentmindedly as she wove her way through the kitchen.

Draco’s face went slack. Hermione looked at him.

“I’m sorry, is that OK?”

“Yea,” Draco said, his voice cracking a little. “Yea, it’s OK.”

Ron raised an eyebrow. Draco looked like he blinked back a tear. Hermione handed Draco her son.

Kelly found a most wonderful thing: blond hair. He squealed happily before he grabbed two handfuls of it. Thankfully he didn’t tug too hard.

Hey!” Draco protested weakly.

“Gettem!” Ron said enthusiastically. Hermione slapped Ron on the back of the head.

Draco untangled himself and poked Kelly on the nose.

“We don’t assault unsuspecting people,” Draco said sternly. “It’s not nice.”

“Na nie!” Kelly said going for Draco’s hair again.

“'Not nice’ is not a good thing,” Draco insisted, dodging tiny hands.

Hermione giggled. She sat down with a plate of food. Ron looked slightly annoyed as he rose and pulled a high chair over. He took Kelly from Draco and the baby fussed a bit.

“We’ll let you have round 2 after breakfast,” Ron murmured as he strapped Kelly into the chair. Draco looked annoyed.

Hermione sighed and savored a bite of her breakfast. She had a dreamy smile on her face.

“Most peaceful breakfast you’ve had in awhile?” Draco asked as he reached for the plate of bacon.

“You have no idea,” Ron said, putting a small dish of cooled scrambled eggs in front of Kelly. Kelly grabbed a handful of eggs and shoved them in his mouth.

Ron shook his head and smiled.

“I can’t believe they talked you into this.”

“What makes you think they talked me into anything?” Draco said, slightly guarded.

“Because mum is completely mad and Harry’s a sentimental sap,” Ron said. He rubbed the unshaved side of his face and it made a scratchy sound.

“You’ve got that right,” Draco said shaking his head.

“I mean, really, Draco,” Hermione said. “Have you talked this over with Harry thoroughly?”

“Why aren’t you asking him this?” Draco asked, a little sharply.

“Because we’ll get a real answer out of you,” Ron said.

Draco appraised him coolly. “That’s not fair, you know.”

“Tough,” said Hermione.

“You get satisfaction out of seeing me squirm,” Draco accused her crossing his arms.

“You’re avoiding the subject,” she said, eyes narrowed. “And, yes. I quite enjoy it.”

“It’s only fair, you know,” Draco said, his shoulders sagging and his hands going back to his breakfast.

“I’m trying to be nice about it,” Hermione said, still piercing him with her eyes.

“Yes, I’ve talked about it with Harry,” Draco said, chewing on some bacon. “He wants my child but I’m a bit afraid of it. What if he dies? We don’t know enough about this. What type of parent would I be without him?”

Hermione’s face softened.

“I had the twins in the Spanish desert,” Hermione said.

“WHAT!” Draco exploded, his hands banging down on either side of his plate.. “What happened? I never heard anything about this!”

Ron looked genuinely surprised at Draco’s outburst.

“We didn’t tell Molly and Arthur,” Hermione said. “She’d have had a stroke.”

“Certainly she would!” Draco said.

“Well I nearly did!” Ron exclaimed. “I had to help them into the world.”

“I’d have died,” Draco said, shaking his head. “How’d you pull it off? How’d you get in the desert?”

“I was looking for a special flower for a potion,” Hermione shrugged.

“Then she went into labor and the carpet we had at the time broke down halfway back,” Ron said. “It was terrifying.”

“And we didn’t know they were twins,” Hermione said. “We thought something had gone wrong.”

“Oh my God,” Draco said, his face full of disbelief. “What happened?”

“Well, she would have been more help if she’d had a mirror,” Ron said grinning. “Really, all I did was catch them.”

Hermione made a face.

“Well, I’d read a bit about birthing techniques in different parts of the world so I had some idea,” Hermione said. “A lot of people don’t consider birthing that big of a deal.”

“Well, I certainly do,” said Draco visibly annoyed. “Especially if we don’t know anything about men birthing.”

“I’d be terrified,” Ron said. “I think you’re both mad.”

“Ron!” Hermione said, horrified.

“Really, Hermione,” Ron said, annoyed. “Men aren’t made for this sort of thing. The outcome may be tragic.”

“How so?” Draco asked, an eyebrow raised.

“Two words,” Ron said. “Crabbe and Goyle.”

“I completely agree,” Draco said. He wasn’t surprised when the couple had made themselves known, although he did find it repulsive.

“You’re both terrible,” Hermione said hotly.

“Oh, come on, Hermione,” Ron said. “Even you’d have to admit they shouldn’t breed.”

“And they’re not the only ones that shouldn’t” Draco said. “A lot of people are going to rush into things without thinking.”

“So have you thought?” Hermione asked.

“I have,” Draco said with a shaky breath. “I love him. I’d like a family. A good one this time.”

Hermione nodded while Ron tidied up Kelly and gave him more egg.

“I’m sure you’ll do fine,” Hermione said. “We just have to get the mechanics down. This time around we have St. Mungo’s.”

“True,” said Draco.

“I just can’t believe mum was the one to figure it out,” Ron said absentmindedly. “What are the chances?”

“Well, it’s not like anyone was tracking the cycle, was it?” Hermione said. “Now that we have hard evidence we can watch it more closely. What if there’s a trackable cycle of wizarding births?”

“Well, that’s interesting,” Draco said, leaning back.

“Especially for dark wizards,” Hermione said, glumly.

“Gods, this certainly opened a can of worms, didn’t it?” Draco mused.

“Well, better us discover it first than them,” Ron said, grabbing another piece of bacon and nibbling on it.

“Quite true,” Hermione said. “But really, we don’t know anything yet.”

“Am I going to get a –a- thing?” Draco asked suddenly panicked.

“A thing?” Hermione said blankly.

“You know,” Draco said blushing furiously. Ron looked curious. “A woman’s monthly – thing!”

“Heavens no,” Hermione said shocked. Ron burst out laughing.

“Well if it happened to gay males it’s as likely to happen to straight males,” Draco said angrily. “I have a feeling this thing doesn’t differentiate.”

Ron looked at Hermione, shocked.

“Well, yes,” Hermione said. “All males will have the chance to get pregnant.”

“Not a chance,” Ron said firmly.

“Well, that’s not something you have to worry about,” Hermione said, ignoring her husband.

“Good,” said Draco, relaxing a bit. “I have a feeling I’ll have enough to worry about.”

“You have no idea,” said Hermione.

AN: I barely remember large families and gatherings from when I was a kid. I hope I got this right. Should I drop the attempt to write an accent? Also, I don’t know how far I can take this without it pushing a banned rating.

-+-+-

Hermione swirled a clear green liquid in a beaker in front of her face.

“Are you sure that’s safe?” Ron asked from his place across the room. He was seated at a small table with a catalog of Quidditch supplies in front of him.

“What makes you ask?” Hermione asked, her eyes blinking behind thick glass goggles.

Ron started snickering.

“It’s to magnify things,” Hermione said as she ripped them off. They made a heavy clunking sound as they hit the heavy stone desk in front of her.

“Sure it is,” Ron laughed. “I still can’t believe you’re doing this.”

“Honestly, I can’t either,” Hermione said shaking her head. “But if they’re going to do this I’m going to get some answers.”

“Well, good for you,” Ron said, going back to his catalog. He licked a finger and turned a page.

“What are you doing, anyway?” Hermione asked. She dropped a pinch of a dirty looking powder into the beaker.

“Looking into training brooms,” Ron said, blushing.

“Oh for pity’s sake,” Hermione said, annoyed. She stirred the liquid with a glass straw. She put her finger on the end and captured a bit of the liquid. She put it in a small bottle, stopped the end and wrote a note in her notebook. Then she carefully made a label and put it on a shelf.

“Well, the twins keep wanting to ride with Harry,” Ron said. “But they forget to hold on. If they have their own they won’t pester him as much.”

“How much do training brooms go for?” Hermione asked. She lit a small fire under a bunson burner and set the beaker on top of it.

“Too much,” Ron sighed. “We could get one and they could take turns.”

Hermione made a face. “They’re usually good at sharing.”

“Well, at least Draco and Harry can afford to supplement a family,” Ron said sighing.

“We do alright,” Hermione said going to Ron and putting an arm around him.

“Yea,” said Ron, looking out into the yard. The twins and Leo were chasing each other around. Kelly was in an enchanted playpen nearby. Molly and Arthur were bringing out trays of food. Charlie had just arrived with his family and Bill was on his way with his. “We have it OK.”

“We do,” Hermione smiled.

-+-+-

Draco traced a long slender finger down Harry’s spine and smiled as goose bumps rose. He scratched lightly with his fingernail and watched as Harry shivered.

The boy-who-lived-to-be-a-sexy-man was tied face down to his bedposts, a pillow under his hips. He was grinning fiercely. Draco noted Harry was still wearing a horrible handmade set of socks. One was orange with yellow stars and one was green with small bees. Draco shook his head in disbelief.

This man would not be allowed to clothe his child.

Draco planted a gentle kiss on Harry’s lower back before entering him.

Harry gasped a bit at the intrusion but was thankful for the lubricating spell Draco used beforehand. He heard Draco mutter above him and his pillow transfigured into something that gripped and massaged his erection.

“Dear lord, where did you learn that?” Harry asked, arching his back.

“I was flipping through a book in Knockturn Alley,” Draco said, reaching around to pinch Harry on a nipple. “Something about Victorian depravities.”

“Did you buy it?” said Harry excitedly as small sparks went off behind his eyes.

“Like I’d be seen buying that,” Draco said, biting Harry on the shoulder.

“You suck,” Harry panted, thrusting back.

“We need an emergency thingy for that!” said Draco, triumphantly.

“What?” Harry asked, confused. He stopped thrusting and started laughing. Draco gasped.

“You should laugh more, it feels great,” Draco said, gripping Harry on the hips. “What do you mean, ‘what’?”

“What’s an emergency thingy?” Harry asked, interested.

“This,” Draco said. Harry felt Draco slide out of him and he frowned. Then he heard a bit of rustling and Draco pulled a condom out of a small brown bag he had concealed in his robes.

“Oh,” Harry said. “Of course.”

The Ministry had in fact issued emergency information packets to all the wizarding households in the UK. Wizarding condoms were enchanted to feel like you were wearing nothing and were available through both St. Mungo’s and owl post.

“I think we’re going to have to start over,” Draco laughed.

“I don’t have a problem with that,” Harry said, grinning. “Just keep them nearby this time.”

-+-+-

Hermione waited in the kitchen reading a book.

“Can we knock on the door now?” Leo asked.

“Not until the cookies are out of the oven and are ready to eat,” Hermione said for the eighth time that evening. “Papa’s still cranking the ice cream. Go outside and help him.”

Leo plodded outside with his older brothers. She had never seen them so morose about waiting for dessert. Perhaps it was time for training brooms after all. It was a popular sport; they got exercise, eye-hand coordination and whatnot.

Also, it got them out of her hair and that was priceless at times.

Hermione looked up to the sound of bare feet padding down the stairs. Harry appeared in a pair of loose trousers and no shirt.

“You should get dressed,” Hermione said, an eyebrow cocked. “Everyone will be here soon.”

The screen door slapped open and Molly Weasley came in, carrying Kelly.

“This one needs a change,” Molly said and looked up to see Harry half dressed. “Oh heavens!”

Molly Weasley turned bright red. So did Harry.

Kelly gurgled happily at the sight of Harry and reached for him.

“Oh! He wants you to change him!” Molly gushed with a wicked twinkle in her eye. “Isn’t that sweet!”

“Lucky me,” said Harry, making a face at Molly. Then he made a face at Kelly. “Come on, Stinky.”

Kelly grabbed a handful of Harry’s chest hair and squealed delightedly. Harry winced as they walked into the next room.

“At least he does nappies,” Hermione remarked. “Already he’s more helpful that Ron with the twins.”

Molly snorted as she opened the icebox and grabbed a pitcher of lemonade. “Don’t blame me for that, my dear. I warned you how hopeless he was.”

Hermione smiled out the window to see Ron leading a very small parade around the yard, each Weasley child wearing a colorful paper hat.

“He’s lucky he’s so cute,” Hermione said.

Molly chuckled to herself as she walked back out into the yard. “That’s what I said about Arthur years ago. Good luck. You’ll need it.”

Hermione shook her head as a second set of bare feet padded down the stairs. Draco appeared, his hair wet and also shirtless. Hermione stared for a moment. Then she shook her head to clear it.

Draco flexed. He posed for a moment.

“Oh good Lord, Malfoy,” Hermione said, both amused and annoyed. “Help Harry with Kelly and get out of my kitchen.”

“It’s my kitchen,” Draco said with an arch of an eyebrow.

“Whatever,” Hermione said and flicked water at him. Draco shuffled out of the room. A timer dinged and with a wave of her wand she removed a sheet of cookies the size of a toboggan from the magical oven and laid it to rest on the large kitchen table to cool.

The next thing she heard was: “Jesus fuck, Potter! How’d you manage to get it all over the couch!”

She heard Harry frantically shushing Draco. Hermione started to worry.

Before Hermione could investigate she heard: “Scourgefy!” She shook her head. At least together they appeared to be capable.

“Piece of cake,” Harry said sheepishly as he returned to the kitchen. Draco followed him, shaking his head.

“Well,” Hermione took Kelly from Harry. “How’d it go?”

“I had a good time,” Draco said, stretching. Hermione rolled her eyes.

The back door banged open and Fleur Weasley stood in the door, her stomach bulging slightly. She was looking radiant, her veela blood giving her a glowing appearance.

“'Ermione!” she squeaked, her French accent thick from a recent visit to her parents.

“Fleur!” Hermione said excitedly. “Wow, you’re starting to show!”

“With 5 more months to go,” Fleur said rolling her eyes. “I have a feeling this baby will be a monster. It is already as big as a ‘ouse.”

“You may have twins,” Harry suggested.

“May you ‘ave twins,” Fleur said coolly. “Then you will see.”

“I’ve seen,” Hermione said. The door burst open and two small light blonde heads ran into the kitchen.

“Bonjour!” the smallest called out.

“Bonjour, beau home!” Draco said before he was nearly knocked over by Fleur’s boys.

“Pierre! Maurice!” Fleur said sharply. “'E do not blow into a home and smack into unsuspecting people!”

“We said ‘ello first!” the eldest protested.

“I give up,” Fleur said, throwing her hands up in the air.

“Are the cookies done yet?” Leo asked, sticking his head in the back door. “You’re done mating!” He squealed triumphantly when he spotted Draco and Harry. Kelly shrieked an accompaniment.

There was a chorus of laughing from not far off it sounded as if the Weasley men were hovering nearby enough to hear Leo. Harry and Draco turned bright red.

“Lord, I’m getting a shirt on,” Draco said, darting upstairs. Harry quickly handed Kelly to Hermione and darted upstairs, Leo, Pierre, and Maurice chasing him merrily.

“Boys!” Hermione called after them, only to be flatly ignored. “Oh, I don’t care. Someone’s watching them.”

Fleur laughed in understanding.

“After seeing this madness they still want a baby,” Fleur shook her head, her long mane of thick blonde hair waving behind her, its tips lifted as if in an invisible breeze. Hermione tried not to be annoyed. It wasn’t Fleurs fault her grandmother was a veela. “They are in love truly, I think.” Fleur looked thoughtfully at Hermione.

“I think they might be,” Hermione admitted. “I just can’t see either of them pregnant.”

Fleur began to snicker. Hermione joined her. Kelly cuddled closer to his mother and giggled. He took one of Hermione’s long curls in one of his hands and stuck his thumb in his mouth.

“It’s a natural phenomenon,” Hermione said, trying to compose herself.

“So ez ‘Ourette’s Syndrome,” Fleur said. Hermione laughed.

“What’s all this giggling in here?” Ron poked his head in the kitchen.

“'Ese foolish wanting baby men,” Fleur said as she peered at Hermione’s cookies.

“I think they’re nuts,” Ron said shaking his head. “But the ice cream’s done.”

“Is Bill with you?” Hermione asked.

“Yea,” Ron said grinning. “He’s losing more hair every year. Don’t know how you stand it, Fleur. Dad took some of the kids to the pond to skip stones. Throw up sparks when the cookies hit the table.”

Fleur pursed her lips at him. “'E still has his sexy boots.”

“Sexy boots get you bonus points,” Hermione said matter-of-factly to Ron. “And couldn’t you lot stick around for five minutes? They’re already out.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Ron said. “Where are the boys?”

“Helping Harry and Draco get dressed,” Hermione said, gauging Ron’s reaction.

“They expect to get dressed with that lot helping?” Ron said, amused. “Good luck to them. We might see them by the Fred, George, and Ginny close up shop and come over.”

Hermione laughed. “Good point.” Ron really had accepted the situation. Good.

Ron snaked into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around Hermione. Kelly reached his arms out to his father and Ron took him. “How long has it been since the whole family has gotten together?”

“At Christmas, oh so many ages ago,” said Hermione in mock melodrama.

“Nearly six months then,” Ron remarked in mock astonishment. He kissed her on the forehead.

“Oh bugger!” Hermione said suddenly. “I have to take readings from Draco and Harry.”

She kissed Ron quickly and trotted up the stairs leading to the boys’ bedroom.

“'O ‘ou find any of zis odd?” Fleur asked Ron.

“I think they’re all insane and mum’s their ringleader,” Ron said with a furtive look at the stairs, making sure Hermione couldn’t hear him. He bounced Kelly softly while Kelly explored Ron’s nose with the hand he had caressed Hermione’s curl with. His thumb was stuck securely in his mouth and his eyes were wide open and curious.

“Zo nothing un’us’ual,” Fleur said, teasing the baby with a finger. Kelly suddenly lost interest in his father’s nose and became enraptured with Fleur.

“Not that I can tell,” Ron said handing Kelly to Fleur. Fleur balanced him on her stomach.

“Good.”

Harry was helping Ron cook breakfast when the smell of crisp, perfect bacon filled the air. Harry choked for a moment and fled the room.

“Are you alright?” Ron asked, worried.

He found Harry in the next room, holding onto the umbrella basket as if his life depended on it. His face was a sickly shade of green.

“I’ll get Hermione,” Ron said, slightly panicked. Harry nodded miserably.

Ron ran from the room, his socks slipping on the hardwood floor.

Harry held onto the umbrella basket, praying. The nausea began to subside and he loosened his grip slightly.

He felt his fingers ache and he looked down at his hands as if he didn’t believe they could grip something that tightly. There were slight indentions in the thin metal where his fingers had dug in.

“Good lord,” Harry groaned. “Hermione did this how many times?”

Hermione slid down the hall in her pink slippers and robe in her rush to get to Harry. Ron followed her close behind.

Harry noticed she had a small bottle in her hand.

“Drink this,” Hermione said hurriedly and she shoved the bottle in Harry’s hands.

Harry downed the watery, slightly sweet, potion Hermione had given him. His nausea was gone immediately, although he still felt weak.

“Brilliant,” Harry croaked weakly. Hermione nodded knowingly.

“What was that?” Ron asked curiously.

“Morning sickness potion,” Hermione said shaking her head at Harry. “I have to run a test to make sure.”

“I think you’d better,” said Ron, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Please get Draco,” Harry whimpered.

Ron nodded and padded back down the hall. Hermione knelt next to Harry on the floor. “Are you OK?”

“I don’t feel like I’m going to die anymore,” Harry groaned as Hermione helped him to his feet.

Hermione snickered. “Well, don’t forget to take another one in an hour or you’ll feel worse. They have a way of catching up with you.”

“Good lord,” Harry said as he followed Hermione back into the kitchen.

He silently thanked God Ron had gotten more responsible over the years and took the pans off the burners before fleeing the kitchen. Breakfast was half cooked and cooling quickly, but Hermione seemed to think it would be fine.

Draco and Ron crashed around the corner, knocking a hat stand over in their rush. Hermione shook her head.

“You know, the children will never sleep through that racket.”

As if on cue, the baby started crying.

“I’ll get him,” Ron said as Hermione glared at him. He fled the kitchen.

“Bring the red bottle near the diaper bag,” Hermione called after him. She glanced at Harry and smiled.

Draco had a hand on Harry’s back and looked very concerned. Harry was shaking his head. “I’m OK.”

“Ron said you were an awful site,” Draco murmured.

“I’m sure he’s fine if that potion worked,” Hermione said sarcastically. “Don’t get silly.”

“Well, it’s not as if this type of thing happens everyday,” Draco said defensively. “He could be worse than anyone imagines.”

“Better survival rate than females, remember,” Hermione said as she placed the food back on the burners. “Much higher chances, actually. I’ll loan you the book. He’s acting positively normal.”

Draco relaxed visibly and gave Harry a gentle shove. “Whiner.”

“Bugger off,” Harry grinned.

“What’s ‘bugger’ mean?” Leo asked as he walked into the kitchen carefully carrying a red stoppered bottle.

“It’s a very rude word that nice people do not use in polite company,” Hermione said as she glared at Harry. He pinked slightly.

That seemed to be enough for Leo because he set the bottle on the kitchen table and sat patiently waiting for food. Hermione waved her wand and an apple flew out of the ice box and fell into pieces in front of Leo.

“Thank you,” he said and waved a piece at Draco in offering.

“Thank you,” said Draco as he shoved the piece of apple into Harry’s mouth. “Eat,” he said to Harry.

“For crying out loud,” Harry mumbled around the apple.

“You should drink that potion,” Hermione said. “Just to make sure.”

Harry took the small bottle in his hands and loosened the stopper. Draco breathed in as Harry swallowed the sweet potion.

“How long does it take?” Draco asked.

“Not long,” Hermione said as she turned around with a plate of bacon. “See.”

Draco looked startled as Harry’s forehead started glowing with a reddish aura. “Oh my God.”

“What?” said Harry, trying to look at his own forehead.

“A girl,” Draco whispered. “We’re going to be parents. We have a daughter.”

“A girl?” Harry breathed. “How do you know?”

“Boys are blue,” Leo piped in a voice that insinuated Harry was stupid.

“Don’cha know?” Draco said grinning.

“Well then,” Harry said, resting a hand on his abdomen. “It doesn’t even seem like it’s real.”

Hermione hugged Harry tightly. “You will have so much support in this. Don’t you worry at all. I know it’s scary.”

“I don’t think I’ve been pregnant long enough to be scared yet,” Harry laughed.

“Will Kelly have someone to play with?” Leo asked as he reached for a piece of bacon.

“The baby won’t be here for quite a while,” Hermione smiled. “Kelly will be running around with you by then.”

“Does it really happen that fast?” Draco asked as he helped Harry sit down.

“You don’t need to coddle him, you know,” Hermione chortled. “It seems like it happens faster. One minute they’re crying in the middle of the night and the next they’re trying to catapult the cat across the yard.”

“What!” Draco laughed trying to look horrified.

“Birds fly, don’t they?” Leo protested.

“A better bird-catcher?” Harry asked.

“We gave him a helmet,” Leo said as his mother put a plate of scrambled eggs on the table. “He liked it.”

Draco looked at Hermione.

“Crazy cat,” Hermione muttered. “Belongs in this family, I swear.”

“One from Crookshanks and that big black one that was hanging around your house?” Harry asked.

“The one that delivered under the porch the day the twins were born?” Hermione chuckled. “Yea.”

“Well, there’s a sign,” Draco said as the twins slid down the hall in their socks and narrowly missed upsetting the hat rack.

“A girl!” The twins squealed as they spotted Harry.

Ron walked into the kitchen holding Kelly. “Congratulations are in order, I see.”

“Thanks,” said Harry embarrassed.

“You might want to floo your mum,” Draco suggested. “She’ll be upset if she doesn’t know right away.”

“You’ve got her pegged,” Ron snorted and handed Hermione her youngest son. He walked to the stove and served the fried potatoes in a big wooden bowl. “I’ll go.”

Hermione strapped Kelly in his chair and put a few potatoes in front of him after blowing on them. He didn’t seem interested after she handed him a small cup of milk, however.

Ron walked out of the room and to Harry’s surprise, Draco followed him. Harry shook his head and began loading up his plate.

“What are you going to name your little girl?” Leo asked. The twins swiveled their heads and Harry felt his cheeks turn red.

“I don’t know,” Harry said. “We hadn’t given it much thought.”

“Heard you had a boy’s name,” Hermione snorted.

“That was Draco being stupid,” Harry waved her off and poured Leo some apple juice. “We didn’t have anything picked out.”

“I like Tonks,” Leo said.

“I like her, too,” said Hermione quickly. “But I think they want to pick out their own name.”

Leo seemed to mull this over.

“Josephine?” William suggested. Harry could tell them apart this morning because their pajamas had their initials monogrammed on them.

“Dracaena?” Adam said mischievously.

“Absolutely not,” Ron said walking back into the kitchen. “Mum’s on her way. Draco’s talking to her.”

“We’ll need more food,” sighed Hermione as she tried to rise from the table. Ron put a hand on each of her shoulders and pushed her back down.

“Like mum didn’t have breakfast ready at her house,” Ron snorted. “They’re just getting plates.”

Hermione looked relieved.

Arthur Weasley appeared in the door of the kitchen with Draco behind him, his hair uncombed and his pajamas rumpled. He shook his head at Harry, but was smiling. “Got yourself knocked up, did you?”

Harry felt his cheeks burn as Draco sat heavily beside him looking quite proud of himself.

“What’s ‘knocked up?'” Leo asked excitedly.

“Something else rude!” Hermione said quickly. “I swear, I should start using memory charms.”

Ron laughed heartily. “You’d never!”

“You’re right,” Hermione admitted. Arthur bent down and kissed her on the top of the head. Hermione scowled.

“We do love you, you know,” Harry snickered at her.

“You’re all plotting my demise,” Hermione muttered as she speared a bit of potato on her fork.

“Muahahahaha,” the twins chuckled in unison, rubbing their hands together.

“Dear Lord,” Molly said as she walked into the kitchen stirring batter in a bowl. “I think I see what they inherited from the Weasley side.”

“You have no idea,” Hermione said wearily.

“Grandma!” Adam, William, and Leo cried out.

“Hello, my loves,” Molly said beaming at them. “We’ll have muffins, soon.”

“We already have food,” Leo said sarcastically.

“We’ll see about that,” said Draco, stealing some potatoes and a piece of bacon off Leo’s plate.

“Hey!” Leo protested.

“You need room for grandma’s muffins,” said Ron. “Shush.”

Molly sat her bowl down and waved her wand at it. As the muffins began to make themselves she swooped down upon Harry and Draco, knocking their heads together soundly.

“Mum!” Ron shouted. “For Merlin’s sake!”

“It’s just so exciting!” Molly exclaimed, wiping a tear from her eye and giving both Harry and Draco a kiss before swooping down on the little ones.

“More exciting than us?” Adam asked.

“I don’t know about that,” Hermione said exasperatedly.

“Somehow I doubt it,” Arthur said smiling at them. They looked pleased.

“You two are positively angels compared to your naughty uncles,” Molly said gently as she ruffled the twins hair.

“We need to work on that,” William remarked. Molly smacked him.

“I don’t think you need to work on anything,” said Ron shaking his head. “I think you need to finish eating and get dressed for the day.”

“Grandma’s muffins!” Adam protested.

“Will probably be ready and cooled by the time you get back down,” Arthur said. “You have plenty of time. Go get your robes on.”

“Then Quidditch!” Leo crowed hopping up from the table,

“Finish your plate,” Hermione pointed to the last few bites on his plate.”

Leo grumbled, but picked his fork back up. The twins inhaled their plates at an alarming speed before leaping to their feet and sprinting from the room.

“Amazing,” Draco mused as they crashed up the stairs.

Leo polished his plate and cleaned what was left if Adam and William’s plates. He snatched a piece of bacon back from Draco before sauntering upstairs after the twins.

“You should keep an eye on that one,” Draco said seriously.

“Trust me, we do,” Hermione said rolling her eyes.

Draco gave Harry a look.

“What do you mean?” Harry said seriously. The Weasleys looked up.

“He’s a Slytherin through and through,” Draco said, one eyebrow raised.

Molly shot him a look. Ron chuckled. Hermione smacked Ron.

“Well, it’s true,” Draco said as he turned his attention to his potatoes.

“He’s got a point,” Arthur said reluctantly. “He’s even got the swagger down.”

“Well, not all of them went bad,” Harry said, trying not to laugh.

“We’ll borrow the sorting hat and put it on your bulging belly and see how you feel,” Hermione said coolly.

“I don’t think it works that way,” Arthur said patronizingly. “But Draco does have a point. Leo’s got quite a talent for getting what he wants.”

Hermione snorted, but looked at Draco warily. “As if one wasn’t bad enough.”

Draco made a face at her.

This was going far better than planned.

Draco woke to Harry nuzzling the back of his neck. He groaned and pulled the covers over his head.

“Morning.” Harry whispered into Draco’s fair blond hair.

“Harrumph!” Draco snorted into the thick bed coverings.

“I love you!” Harry sounded terribly hopeful as Draco felt a prodding at his bottom.

“You’d better, if I have to put up with this nonsense.” Draco groaned. He turned over and flopped an arm over Harry’s head. “Go back to sleep.”

Harry pushed Draco’s arm off his head and tried to wrestle his limp lover’s body back over. “And you’re so sweet and charming in the morning.” He grunted as Draco’s dead weight shifted. “Dear Lord, you’ve put on a few.”

Draco was suddenly awake and pummeling Harry with a pillow. “I most certainly have not! And you’re one to talk!”

Harry suddenly froze. Draco wished with all his will that he could have taken it back, but it was too late. He saw tears pool up in Harry’s eyes.

“Oh for the love of Merlin, you know what I meant!”

“I know!” Harry angrily wiped the tears from his eyes. “It’s the damn hormones going crazy again. I swear, Hermione deserves an award and Molly needs a national holiday.”

It had been 3 months since Harry had his pregnancy confirmed. He was officially driving Draco batty, and they still had months to go.

“I’m fairly sure Ron and Arthur deserve an honorable mention as well.” Draco handed Harry a tissue from a box near the bed.

“Probably.” Harry sniffled.

Draco chuckled. “We should’ve expected this, you know.”

“I know.” Harry sounded miserable.

“It’s all perfectly natural.” Draco assured Harry.

“If you’re a girl!” Harry protested.

“Not according to the book Molly was so sweet to provide us with.” Draco said silkily.

“Only once a millenea and for all we know wizards have evolved so much we’re not suited for this sort of thing anymore!” Harry scowled. “This whole thing is a risk!”

“Now whose fault is that?” Draco laughed. “I would have been happy carrying on as we were! You’re the sentimental sap that had to bear the fruit of my loins!”

“You are happy, aren’t you?” Harry asked tentatively.

“More than I ever could have imagined.” Draco sighed.

Harry studied Draco’s face for a moment. Then he sighed contentedly and rested his head on Draco’s chest. Draco sighed in relief this conversation was over, or at least sensible. It was so hard to tell these days.

-+-+-

Molly sat humming to herself by her hearth while Arthur was at work. How quiet the house had become since Ginny finally moved out. She was knitting a pair of purple baby booties and thinking about tentative plans for a baby shower. Hermione had suggested it and Molly had latched onto the idea.

Molly briefly glanced up as the front door opened and Arthur strolled through.

“Hello, dear.” He smiled as he kissed his wife’s cheek. “Are those for the boys or Hermione and Ron?”

Molly snorted. “Hermione claims they have enough booties to clothe a small centipede colony.”

“She may have a point.” Arthur said as he hung his cloak on the hat rack near the door. “You were rather enthusiastic when the twins were on the way.”

“That’s only because our twins ran through them like tissue paper.” Molly protested hotly.

“Well, Hermione was rather well at,” Arthur coughed politely, “keeping track of booties better than we did.”

“That’s only because their twins didn’t yank them off and fling them off at every opportunity!” Molly protested.

Arthur held his hands up. “Don’t tell me, dear! I was there!”

Molly’s face softened. “I suppose you were, weren’t you?”

“And I always will be.” Arthur went to his wife and knelt at her feet. “And if we were younger than we were now I’d try to learn more about this phoenominon so we could see if I could carry instead of you for a change.”

“You’d do that?” Molly asked quietly. “You would have carried one of them?”

“It would be an honour, my love.” Arthur insisted as he wrapped his arms around her. “I wouldn’t want to be the mother of anyone else’s child.” He choked on his laughter.

Molly playfully slapped him on the shoulder. “Bloody oaf.”

-+-+-

A tawny colored owl soared over wild, open land. He could see the lake and smell the approaching water. It had been quite some time since he had gotten the chance to fly to Hogwarts and he did miss the other owls.

When the castle came into view he hooted with joy and pumped his wings harder. He was looking forward to seeing Hagrid and settling down for the night in the owlery.

He soared out over the grounds: over the Quidditch pitch, around the back of the castle, over the gardens, until he landed on the perch that stood outside Hagrid’s hut.

Hagrid looked up as he heard a soft hooting and a flutter of wings. He smiled as the little owl settled on the perch outside his home.

“Hello, Pigwidgeon!” Hagrid wiped the sweat out of his eyes and walked to the perch. “Message from the Weasley clan?”

Pig hooted gleefully and shook a leg at Hagrid. There were three letters attached to it.

“Now, what’s all this?”

Hagrid peered at the letters and pulled his reading glasses out of his jacket. He took the letter marked for him from Pig and opened it.

His eyebrows went up in surprise as he opened the card inside. Then he shook his head as he closed it.

“That woman really is a piece of work.” Hagrid chuckled to himself. He looked at the owl. “Stop by before you leave. I’ll have a message back by then.”

Pig hooted cheerfully and took an owl treat Hagrid had produced from his pocket before he took to the air and headed towards the castle.

-+-+-

Molly and Hermione bustled around the Weasley kitchen preparing a celebration dinner for Harry and Draco. Pigwidgeon flew through the window and nearly knocked into Draco, who was carrying an empty bowl back into the kitchen.

“You weren’t supposed to tear into them yet!” Hermione said in a surprised voice. “Those were supposed to go with dinner!”

“I couldn’t stop them.” Draco said innocently. “I was outnumbered.”

“There are plenty more, Hermione.” Molly wiped her hands on her apron and went to the little owl who was sitting on his perch, letters dangling from his leg. She peered at the envelopes. “It looks like they all replied!”

“Well, that’s nice.” Hermione said as she bustled over to the owl.

“What is all that?” Draco asked as he went looking for more rolls among the piles of food ready to be carried into the eating area.

“RSVP’s for the baby shower.” Molly murmured as she opened an envelope.

“What?!” Draco exclaimed.

“We’re throwing you a baby shower.” Hermione sounded apologetic.

“Everyone is coming!” Molly beamed up from the opened letters.

“Don’t let Hagrid bring any nibbles.” Hermione warned.

“You invited Hagrid?!” Draco looked stunned.

“She invited half the Wizarding World.” Hermione snorted. “I’ve survived several, you can survive one.”

“This is our first co-ed one.” Molly reminded Hermione. “There will be a lot more people.”

“Good heavens.” Draco said weakly. He remembered his manners abruptly. “Thank you, Molly. How very thoughtful.”

Molly laid the letters on the table, gave Pig an owl treat, and went back to her kitchen tasks, humming pleasantly to herself.

Hermione met Draco’s eyes and slipped out of the room with a bowl of rolls. He followed closely behind her.

“A baby shower?” Draco questioned her as soon as they were out of Molly’s earshot.

“I couldn’t have stopped her if I’d wanted to.” Hermione shrugged. “It’s an excuse for her to organize a get together.”

Draco pursed his lips. “I suppose you did your best.”

“At least I got her to leave out Snape.”

Draco looked horrified. “Thank heaven for that!”

“Although he may be over to observe the birth.”

“WHAT?!”

“Well, I do talk to him professionally. He’s been collecting information on the hormonal changes of males during puberty during the phenomenon.”

“So why does he have to be here during the birth?”

Molly sailed out of the kitchen, parting the air between them and beaming as she went. They both smiled at her until she was out of sight.

“He doesn’t have to be.” Hermione threw an annoyed look at Draco. “It was just a thought. This is a once in a lifetime occurrence. I’m sure any male choosing to carry will get offers from people wanting to observe the phenomenon.”

“Snape would be the best person to have around if any emergency potions are needed.” Draco looked thoughtful.

“Just think about it.” Hermione waved a hand dismissively.

Draco shrugged. “It’s all up to Harry. Whatever he decides.”

“Fair enough.” Hermione said.

-+-+-

“Absolutely not!” Harry howled.

“That’s not fair!” Hermione stomped her foot at him.

“Too bad!” Harry threw his arms up dramatically.

Draco and Ron snickered in an adjoining room where they were building a house of cards of a deck of Exploding Snap. Ron shrugged at Draco. Draco just shook his head.

“She’s quite bonkers, you know.” Ron said in a low voice.

“I could’ve told you that.” Draco smirked.

“This is the chance of a lifetime, Harry!”

Harry stormed through the room, Hermione close on his heels and fuming at him.

“He’s a horrible greasy git and I’m not having him there to laugh at me!” Harry wheeled around at her and his heavy tread shook the floor, thus shaking the table and causing an explosion and flurry of cards.

Draco jumped in surprise and Ron covered his head with his arms.

“We’ll let you know.” Draco told Hermione.

Harry glared at Draco.

“We need to think about every possibility when it comes to your safety.” Draco insisted.

“I assumed I’d be going to St Mungo’s.” Harry said hotly. “I see no need to take an army with me.”

“You’ll be lucky if they don’t put you in an observation room with coliseum seats.” Ron said. “Do you have any idea how many people will want to see this?”

“You really might want to consider a home birth.” Draco said frowning. “Even if we just do it for security. We may want to call in a couple Aurors.”

“I think that may be a bit extreme.” Hermione frowned. “But I agree with home birthing. You should have a select few people be there, not every Healer and intern that wants to watch. Childbirth is stressful enough without being the center of a show.”

“And remember, most male births the last time around had a better survival rate than women giving birth.” Ron added.

“You can’t be agreeing with them!” Harry fumed incredulously.

“I’m saying I don’t like Snape either, but it makes sense for him to be there.” Ron snapped. “Deal with it, Harry. You were the insane one that wanted to get knocked up without thinking about how dangerous it was.”

Harry looked as if Ron had slapped him.

“What you’re doing is more than a little stupid.” Ron spread his feet apart and put his hands on his hips. “Now stop being so stubborn and do what makes this easier on you and your baby in the long run. And honestly, I’ve never seen Snape laugh at anything. He may sneer at you but that’s about it.”

“Anything else would be considered off color and he’d never stoop that low.” Draco tentatively offered.

Harry looked from Draco to Ron. He looked furious. Then his shoulders drooped and he closed his eyes. “I’ll consider it.”

“Thank you.” Hermione let out the breath she had been holding in case she had to yell some more.

-+-+-

An owl fluttered down one of the corridors to Hogwarts’ maze of underground dungeons. It twisted and turned down hallways until it soared into Professor Snape’s classroom and perched happily upon a globe balanced upon a pile of books on the corner of the Professor’s desk. The owl hooted softly.

Professor Snape looked up from the small dish of microscopic newts, an ingredient for the Fifth years. The magnifying glasses were still perched on his nose, giving him a clear view of the barbs on the owl’s feathers and giving the owl a clear view of Snape’s pupils.

It hooted in alarm and tried to scrabble backwards.

Snape whipped the glasses off and grabbed impatiently at the owl. “Come here, you stupid bird. I’m not going to hurt you.”

Snape gently removed the scroll case from the leg of the owl and unrolled the parchment within.

“Well, it looks as if one of them has a vague idea of what sense is.” Snape shook his head as he gave the owl a treat and shooed him out of the window. “Barely reassuring.”

For a moment the potions professor looked thoughtful, but then his attention was distracted by a knocking at his door.

He smiled silkily. The detention for this evening was right on time and the Third Years had produced a particularly disgusting batch of cauldrons ripe for cleaning.

It was going to be a good eening.